얼마 전 “여자친구”에게 차여서 무척 힘들어하고 있다는 린지 로한이 애인을 구하기 위해 직접 올렸다는 스스로의 프로필. 정말 웃기다 ㅋㅋ

아래는 스크립트. 재밌는 부분만 쓰면,

“안녕, 내 이름은 린지 이고 얼마 전에 싱글이 됐어요. 난 내 평생을 함께할 상대를 찾아요. 그게 아니라면 내 집행유예 기간이라도 함께…”

“내 성격을 설명하자면, 흠, 창의적이고 조금 야행성이에요. 난 워커홀릭, 쇼퍼홀릭이고 또, 캘리포니아 주정부에 따르면, 알코홀릭이죠. 그리고 호텔에 일하는 모든 경비요원들의 주의대상이랍니다.”

“내가 파산했다는 루머가 많지만 그렇지 않아요. 사실 내 통장엔 400달러도 넘게 있고 특히 (정말 자랑스럽게도) 말보로 마일드가 2만개 있답니다.”

“난 나와 함께 밤문화를 즐길 연인을 찾아요. 흠, 그 또는 그녀는 물론 운전을 할 줄 알아야 하구요, 내 발목에 찬 전자발찌를 좋아해야 하고, 법원에 접근금지 신청을 할 가족들이 없어야 해요.”

(마지막 부분은 심의상 번역 생략 ㅋ)

Lindsay Lohan: Hi. My name is Lindsay and I’m searching for love.

Lindsay Lohan: I’m recently single, (pause) I think, and I’m looking for someone who I can spend the rest of my life with. Or, at least the rest of my probation with. Ha ha. A little bit about me. I’m an actress, a singer, an entrepreneur and I single handedly kept ninety percent of all gossip websites in business. I would define my personality as, uh, creative. I’m a bit of night owl. I’m a workaholic, a shopaholic, and-

Lindsay Lohan: -according to the state of California, an alcoholic, as well as a threat to all security guards if they work at hotels. And to put all those rumors to rest, I am not broke. I actually have over four hundred dollars in the bank and twenty thousand Marlboro Milds, which I’m very proud of.

Lindsay Lohan: I’m looking for a compatible mate who likes a night out on the town, as long as he or she is driving, of course. Likes ankle monitoring bracelets and doesn’t have family members quick to issue restraining orders. The perfect mate loves long walks on the beach, car chases on the PCH, antiquing, and uh passing out in Cadillac Escalades. So, if you think you can handle a redhead with a little bit of sass-

Lindsay Lohan: -and by that I mean a redhead that’s crazy. I mean, don’t pretend like you don’t know me. We’ve all read about it. We’ll crash a few parties, a car or two, but at the end of the day, I promise you I never lose my googleheads, just my underwear. You can reach me at 612679 or-

Lindsay Lohan: -you can find me on the cover of US Weekly, because I’m so alone.